More Lingo

From the Hollywood to English dictionary:

The Town, n. 1. Los Angeles. 2. Except not all of Los Angeles. 3. Really just the film and television business. 4. Which thinks its all of Los Angeles.

People who work in the industry like to refer to the industry as The Town. Which, I guess means The Town refers to the town as The Town.

The Town is a collective. The Town speaks with one voice. Right now, I'm being told that The Town hasn't indicated whether it's business as usual yet following the writers' strike. The Town is waiting to see how the actors' contract shakes out. The Town can be coy.

The Town is also emotional. During the writers strike, the town was clinically depressed. The town didn't shower for a month. The town subsisted on Cherry Garcia and Cheetos and a tivoed Dog Whisperer marathon.

One day The Town decided that all meetings would come with the option of cold or room temperature water. Except the town didn't actually offer room temperature water -- the Town asked if "you wanted it room?" Because the town doesn't have time for superfluous four syllable words like "temperature".

Just like when you phone someone and they're not in (i.e. not in for you), the Town asks if the person you're calling can "return". The town is much too busy for the words "your call". The Town is an ergonomic ballet with no wasted movement.

"Hi, Dave Wells calling for The Town."
"She's in a meeting. Can she return?"

My feeling is - of course - she can return. She has every right to return. Why couldn't she return?

Unless The Town has banished her from the town.